Thursday, November 18, 2010

3w5d

I'm pregnant!!

It's been a long year. Loooong year. It took us 7 months to get pregnant with Maya, and I never in my wildest dreams thought it would take 13 months with this one. Granted, I'm so fortunate I'm pregnant at all-some it takes years, some never get there-so I'm counting my blessings and am praying this baby sticks with us.

In Jacksonville, there were four different doctors who said I was fine, fine, fine. This is after a summer from hell medically (after I had Maya)-just a lot of problems. When we moved down here every doctor we've dealt with has been amazing, super helpful, and proactive. So in the past 6 months, between Patrick and I we have had a (horribly painful) test, a surgery, and a laparoscopy. I'm downing the Geritol every day while he snacks on Brazil nuts. I lost about 10 pounds over the summer too, to rule out weight, and so I'm happy to be at a healthier starting point than I would have been.

All this combined has made each month increasingly difficult, stressful, and emotional for me. I'm not sure that I would have lasted much longer, honestly! But, those six tests (hahaha) go to show that combined infertility is not the end all-even though it sure feels like it with every big nasty negative test.

***

So this month, probably a week or two ago, Patrick tells me that he just feels differently about this month, really positive about it. Fast forward to Saturday-I took the most massive nap ever, and was still exhausted and fell right to sleep that night. Same thing happened on Monday and Tuesday too-I can't tell you the last time I napped before that. Usually when I do I can't sleep at night.

A few days ago I had a shirt on that just made me look massive. I looked like I've gained about 5 pounds-my belly just stuck out all gross-like. I stepped on the scale, scared to see the number-and not a pound had been gained. I knew then it was bloat, which I've never experienced other than right at the beginning of my pregnancy with Maya (if you look back at old pictures of us getting ready for the Sweetheart Banquet at church in 2008 you can see my belly sticking out the same way it is now-that's before I found out I was pregnant with her, I remember crying about it because I thought I had gained weight and I had "NOTHING to wear!"). I told Patrick a few days ago that I wouldn't be surprised if I was pregnant.

Since I'm obsessed, I started testing at 6DPO (I knew I wouldn't find out either way, but like I said, I'm obsessed). Nothing at 7DPO, nothing at 8 either. So last night I was rummaging around to find my fourth test for this morning but realized I had used it last month after a very strange cycle. All I had was a digital test, and I know that takes quite a bit more hormone than my cheapie dollar tests to register, so I said forget it, I'll test at 10DPO (tomorrow-Friday.)

This morning I got up and used the bathroom when Patrick was getting ready for work. Usually that makes me not waste a test unnecessarily. I went back to sleep for about an hour, and when I got up I just felt a little queasy-so I figured ah, whatever. I'm obsessed. Obsessed people waste tests, especially expensive digital ones. So I took the test, and stood there brushing my teeth while it was waiting... and it seemed to "wait" forever... and my jaw DROPPED when the "pregnant" word popped up! Total denial, I'm NOT used to seeing that (obviously).

I flipped, didn't really know what to do, so I woke Maya up-I happened to have the car today, so I triiiiied my hardest to get her to hurry and get up so we could run to Food Lion and get more tests (obsessive) but she really wanted some oatmeal. Fine, I made the oatmeal, but of course she was horsing around with it, taking her sweet time. I was going to make a cute shirt for Maya to wear for Patrick to find out that just said "big sister" on it, but it was a ridiculously busy morning anyway, so I knew I wouldn't have time. I had been telling Maya there was a baby in my belly (so she's the first person I told... awww) so she was saying "baby, belly" (I hope she doesn't spill the beans to anyone else before we tell them!) so I called Patrick and said "hey, you've GOT to hear what your daughter is saying" and she wouldn't say anything at first... I thought it was going to be a bust... and then she said it. Patrick just laughed, and said "haha, baby belly" ...and then I was quiet... and then he said "wait WHAT?!" I just think both of us were so shocked after it's taken SO long. We're so so so beyond thrilled!

So now we start this. We're taking our time, I'll call Naval next week to get a test to confirm, and start my doctor's appointments then-I'm so BARELY pregnant it's absurd-I won't even be 4 weeks until Saturday (which is fun because Maya's "new week" started on Saturdays too). I'm due July 30, so thankfully I won't spend the ENTIRE summer hugely pregnant!

Now. Is it all in my head, or can I feel things moving around down there?

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